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blame-eve:

Chimamamda Ngozi Adiche, We Should All Be Feminists

(Source: cyberteeth, via the-goddamazon)

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tenacitystrength:

Important info with an application to women’s strength training, I think. It should be understood that not all women have the “Bulky Gene” (that’s what I’ll call the genetic pre-disposition to building a thicker muscular physique). But some women do have the bulky gene. That explains why one woman’s 300lb-deadlifting body may look different from another woman’s 300lb-deadlifting body. Strength training will lead to muscle growth (albeit in varying genetically determined degrees), regardless of whether or not you like it. Women who’ve never been athletic or active all their lives may not have had the experience of seeing their muscular gene expression.

It’s unfortunate that many people use the exception- those with the bulky gene- to prove the false rule that women get big from strength training.

When training your clients or talking to women who are interested in lifting heavy but are concerned about muscle growth. I think it’s more constructive to say that “Yes, you will gain muscle from lifting heavy; however, your genetics will determine how much you gain.” Not, “Oh, don’t worry, you won’t get bulky” (as if it were a bad thing). All forms of muscular gene expression should be affirmed. After many months of training, if you happen to notice that your client does in fact have the “bulky gene,” it should be celebrated, just as much as smaller, stronger women are celebrated.

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explore-blog:

Ann Friedman's Disapproval Matrix for handling criticism is a thing of genius, not to mention essential internet-age literacy. She explains:

Critics: These are smart people who know something about your field. They are taking a hard look at your work and are not loving it. You’ll probably want to listen to what they have to say, and make some adjustments to your work based on their thoughtful comments.
Lovers: These people are invested in you and are also giving you negative but rational feedback because they want you to improve. Listen to them, too.
Frenemies: Ooooh, this quadrant is tricky. These people really know how to hurt you, because they know you personally or know your work pretty well. But at the end of the day, their criticism is not actually about your work—it’s about you personally. And they aren’t actually interested in a productive conversation that will result in you becoming better at what you do. They just wanna undermine you. Dishonorable mention goes to The Hater Within, aka the irrational voice inside you that says you suck, which usually falls into this quadrant. Tell all of these fools to sit down and shut up.
Haters: This is your garden-variety, often anonymous troll who wants to tear down everything about you for no rational reason. Folks in this quadrant are easy to write off because they’re counterproductive and you don’t even know them. Ignore! Engaging won’t make you any better at what you do. And then rest easy, because having haters is proof your work is finding a wide audience and is sparking conversation. Own it.
The general rule of thumb? When you receive negative feedback that falls into one of the top two quadrants—from experts or people who care about you who are engaging with and rationally critiquing your work—you should probably take their comments to heart. When you receive negative feedback that falls into the bottom two quadrants, you should just let it roll off your back and just keep doin’ you.

Complement with Benjamin Franklin’s trick for neutralizing critics, Daniel Dennett on how to criticize with kindness, and Anne Lamott’s definitive manifesto for handling haters.

explore-blog:

Ann Friedman's Disapproval Matrix for handling criticism is a thing of genius, not to mention essential internet-age literacy. She explains:

Critics: These are smart people who know something about your field. They are taking a hard look at your work and are not loving it. You’ll probably want to listen to what they have to say, and make some adjustments to your work based on their thoughtful comments.

Lovers: These people are invested in you and are also giving you negative but rational feedback because they want you to improve. Listen to them, too.

Frenemies: Ooooh, this quadrant is tricky. These people really know how to hurt you, because they know you personally or know your work pretty well. But at the end of the day, their criticism is not actually about your work—it’s about you personally. And they aren’t actually interested in a productive conversation that will result in you becoming better at what you do. They just wanna undermine you. Dishonorable mention goes to The Hater Within, aka the irrational voice inside you that says you suck, which usually falls into this quadrant. Tell all of these fools to sit down and shut up.

Haters: This is your garden-variety, often anonymous troll who wants to tear down everything about you for no rational reason. Folks in this quadrant are easy to write off because they’re counterproductive and you don’t even know them. Ignore! Engaging won’t make you any better at what you do. And then rest easy, because having haters is proof your work is finding a wide audience and is sparking conversation. Own it.

The general rule of thumb? When you receive negative feedback that falls into one of the top two quadrants—from experts or people who care about you who are engaging with and rationally critiquing your work—you should probably take their comments to heart. When you receive negative feedback that falls into the bottom two quadrants, you should just let it roll off your back and just keep doin’ you.

Complement with Benjamin Franklin’s trick for neutralizing critics, Daniel Dennett on how to criticize with kindness, and Anne Lamott’s definitive manifesto for handling haters.

(via thefeltleaning)

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darksilenceinsuburbia:

Valérie Belin

Bouquets (untitled)

2008

Link

myersandbriggs:

The INFJ is as genuinely warm as they are complex. INFJs hold a special place in the heart of people who they are close to, who are able to see their special gifts and depth of caring. INFJs are concerned for people’s feelings, and try to be gentle to avoid hurting anyone. They are very…

(Source: digitalcitizen.ca, via myersandbriggs)

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2headedsnake:

Michel Keck

(Source: michelkeck.com)

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(Source: treerings-sing, via gelopanda)

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missus-ruin:

Set with just the animated ones at full size.

(via thedemilitarizedfriendzone)

Quote
"Men often react to women’s words - speaking and writing - as if they were acts of violence; sometimes men react to women’s words with violence. So we lower our voices. Women whisper, Women apologize. Women shut up. Women trivialize what we know. Women shrink. Women pull back. Most women have experienced enough dominance from men - control, violence, insult, contempt - that no threat seems empty"

— Andrea Dworkin - Intercourse (via echo-chamber)

(via thedemilitarizedfriendzone)